DonAndersen

The Best of the Season to you'all and may 2014 be better than last year. catch ya' Don

A consultants story A cowboy was herding his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?" The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure. Why not?" The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, You have exactly 1586 cows and calves." "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the cowboy. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car. Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" "You're a consultant." says the cowboy. "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?" "No guessing required." answered the cowboy "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don't know anything about my business." "Now give me back my dog”.

Taco, Tis a great video. My thanx, Merry Christmas ALL, DON

Folks, As the fishing season is just around the corner and the new and improved rods are now arriving it seems appropriate the some selling ideas would help. Was running through some old Planing Form [ a newsletter for bamboo builders] yesterday and found this. Try it - it apparently works. Wishin' you'all the Merriest! Don

Two days ago the wind was about 25k and it was -25C and I saw some guys setting up a service rig. The pump jack was already off. When we came back 8 hours later, they were done and were rigging out. Those folks deserve our admiration and thanks. When it's ugly out there, the work continues. Frankly I have no idea what they get paid. It may very well be $100k/yr. Are they worth it - kinda depends on how bad you want to stay warm. And those guys was what the " Poster" is all about. What people in cities fail to realize is everything is delivered to them - food, fuel and electricity. W/O the people who live in the country, most cities would be eating their young in a week. And we got it good out here. For the third time this winter the town staff has removed the snow from the residential side street where I live. They even plowed the alley 2 days ago. Life is good! Keep warm, Don

Taco, Didn't you notice the poster said SWEAT & FREEZE - this is something people working in offices never experience - Calgary is exempt! Don

Ripple, Do both. You will probably fly into & out of Calgary if you are coming from eastern Canada. From NE USA, lots of folks fly into Great Falls and drive up. As others have said, the Bow can be very crowded. Wilderness fishing it isn't. Depending on your launch point you might not get away from traffic noise all day. The Elk is somewhat quieter although there can be a lot of boats on the water as well. The guys from the "Crowsnest Angler" located along the Crowsnest River guide the Elk. A combo trip might include a day or so on the Bow staying in Calgary, a day or so on the Elk while staying in the Crowsnest Pass area, plus days either in SW Alberta or SE BC while still basing yourself out of the Crow. Lots of options. Just need time and money. Don

Taco, Them Norsemen weren't all that picky. And if you're prepared for the explosion you might suggest to my Scottish wife the value of Norsemen who breed some brains into the low landers and when they could be caught, some highlanders. And just to set the record straight, Norsemen "found" N. America long before the Portuguese got lost and stumbled into Central America. Mind you, the Portuguese had a map done by the Chinese in 1421 ( a good read by the way) Now I gotta go and double dip the rods again. Catch ya' Don

Taco, When a Dane and a Dutchman agree, the stars are aligned and the fish Gods smile. Anybody notice the weather getting warmer. And with that, I'll get back to dipping my pole or if you prefer, varnishing my rod. Life is tough, Don

Taco, I do know what rod taper you're looking for but have no idea which of the many rods out there exhibit full-flexing. Still, if you have such a taper, load it up and see how it feels. Muffin, The rod is marked with a line weight by the manufacturer who has decided the line weight. His decision is no more valid than yours. If you think a rod fishes well with a line weight heavier or lighter than marked on the rod, use the line weight that pleases you. You will not anger the fish Gods or cause the rod to explode. Briefly, 40' of #4 is the same weight as 30' of #6. Regards, Don

Taco, A Winston when Tom Morgan ran the place. Tom is a fisherman and knew what it took for a great trout rod. Failing that, if you can find a 9'0" Fisher, I'll arm wrestle you for it. Thought I'd tracked one down 2 years ago. Somebody else beat me to it. Or, take one of your faster 4 weights and put a 6 on it. That just might be what ya' need. Regards, Don

Bird dog, This one works: http://www.skip-morris-fly-tying.com/skips-furry-dragon-simplified.html Or this one: http://www.flyanglersonline.com/flytying/fotw2/042103fotw.php Or this one that I use http://smg.photobucket.com/user/DonAndersen/media/Flys/dragon3w.jpg.html][/url] The above nymphs only represent darners which tend to be more visible than the gomphus nymphs that hide in bottom vegetation. The gomphus tend to be nearly the same color as the vegetation/bottom substrate. Regards, Don

Now, now Taco, You are all saying the a guy using 200 year old technology whales the snot outta the PPD [ penny pinching Dutchman] who throws up his hands 'cause a old guy figures out how to cut, copy and paste. Damn, but life is good and I'm heading downstairs to whittle out another stick. Don

Taco, Below is a link to how fly rods should be tested. That plastic stuff is only good for lettuce storage and this is the reason that plastic fishing poles are known far and wide as Tupperware. Don

Taco, Looked over the Outcast Stealth Pro. Was right, glued one oar locks and the oar lock itself would wear out. Something that my Scadden has and Outcast has also is a "stabilizing" bar ahead of the seat. That makes getting your fins above the water on long row tough. I'm not sure it can even be done. And it matters! Those fins are gonna drag like crazy making a long row even uglier. Of course, with dragging fins and lousy oar system, you best join the electric motor crowd and jump the weight of the whole thing by 80 lbs. For river running where you wear wading boots only the stabilizing bar won't be an issue except you have to step over it to get outta the boat. For safety sake, maybe add a wading staff. Keep upright, Don

Taco, Outcast sells a 9IR Fish cat through the Fishin Hole at $ 689.00. Even a penny punching Dutchman can afford that. As far as I can see, all Outcast boats are at least 5 year warranty. Even a Dutchman should last that long. Don

Taco, I have a frameless Scadden Escape and a Outcast PAC 800. The Scadden is a back up boat whereas the Outcast gets used 90 days/yr. I don't think that the frameless oar system would hack long term use w/o ripping out. Plus the oar lock system would wear out. Get a PAC 800 or 900 or a IR 9. I use a IR 9 frame and oar system for several years and it works just fine. Just remember, while you appear to be crusty, you are not yet old. I bought the Outcast for it's 10 year warranty and I'm 68. Buy a decent boat and it lasts. Frameless boats are a pain to attach anchors, rod holders, fish finders and wheels which at one time are another are used often. Catch ya' Don

Folks, Playing with some dental dam rescued from a bridge replacement. Recycling is the way to go!

BigF.... I really do sympathize with your wader woes. For years I wore Redball Featherweights. They cost me less than $50/pr. and lasted 5>7 years. When I heard they were going outta business, I bought 5 pair figuring that would last the duration. I didn't figure on lake fishing so much and didn't buy enough extra large waders. So in the past 2 years I've spent upwards of $400 - more that I'd spent in the past 50 years. Gotta love this breathable crap! Regards, Don

Win the big one and you can treat all of us to a 747 ride south. Don

After hiding in the basement all day planing cane a friend sends me this: http://vimeo.com/33337585# Don

Pipes, Unlike you, I have a real name and have the balls to believe that oil companies and Govts can do better and have no qualms about posting my name to such thoughts. And frankly, the hype that oil companies provide must be offset by other info. As I have neither the skills or resources to take on yet another project (still working on the oil company sucking up fresh water issue) I will wait for you or others to take on the information gathering and publishing about pipeline leaks. Till you or others spring into life, I guess we have to rely on the people who produce the news to "tell the story". I do realize that TUC gets a pile of it's funding from oil companies. Good thing or bad - you be the judge. As for me I asked and asked for a position paper from TUC regarding the use of fresh water for water floods. After 6 or 7 years, I suspect that I'll never see it. As far as TUC providing me either expertise or money for projects. That hasn't happened in <> 20 years. As far as a coffee chat. Gotta know who you are - got a good take on the what part. Don

Pipes, Yupe, I'm an activist. I do and you sit. Before you start slinging mud, you best take some time and figure out just who I am and what I have done. Till, then you are just a part of the problem. And with that, I'm heading to the basement to start another cane rod for donation to the Edmonton TU Group for their Grayling Project. I think I've have enough of scientists for a while. Useful bunch all! Don

Pipes, While I like many would love to share with you and others a "legimate"study, the Alberta govt doesn't record or track all spills. This is not dis-similar to what I ran into when attempting to discover how much water oil companies used. The data wasn't available. Nobody reported, nobody tracked and frankly few cared. As long as the " business as usual" track was followed and the money flows, screw it - and as often repeated in the oil business - giv'er. If you wish a study that would have valid data, you best look elsewhere than Alberta as you would have discovered if you had read all the report. Of course, to a scientist, what do reporters know! As far as doing it better. You do realize that very few pipelines are monitored except by smell and appearance when the stuff flows outta the ground. Landowners are the first responders in the bulk of pipeline leaks. There are few instances of "smart pigs" being run to check pipeline integrity. Low pressure ESD's only work if the leak is gross. Some leaks may go on for years w/o detection till the leak shows above ground. Frankly, there is no easy solution. As far as scientists effecting much - look to the climate change debate to get a sense of how useful most people see scientific data and whether or not scientific proof will effect out-comes. Don