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Rick's Story Of The Week


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There is a line in the movie "Field of Dreams" that essentially says "baseball is how America marks time." Well in the family I grew up in, stories, or more specifically fishing stories, is how we marked time. I can't put the stories in the exact year, but I do know them chronologically. In fact, I often think that I don't really have a continuous memory of my life, my past is more like a series of stories with big gaps in between.

 

My wife's family however is not blessed (or they would say cursed) with this plethora of fishing stories to relive over and over and over again. They just have one. And this it it.

 

When we were living in Texas, my wife's sister, husband and family came to visit from Edmonton. Their kids are similar in age to my kids and all the adults really get along, so it is always a good time when we get together. Before the trip, the fishing had been pretty good, so I decide to get the bro in law (Mike) out and get him on some fish. He says he catches some from time to time, though I had never actually witnessed it.

 

Anyway, the are we are fishing is a really big saltwater flat, most of which is between waist and chest deep. It's mostly sand bottom and is pretty easy wading. I should mention here that my name on a saltwater board I used to frequent was "Wading Away" as I have a reputation for covering lots of water in a little time. Well, we hit the water at 7 am or so, a little late for me, and start the wade. And wade. And wade. By 9:00 or so I'm starting to feel the pressure a bit as neither of us have caught a thing. And we have covered a pretty good chunk of water. I start to notice that Mike is spending a bit of time looking at some looming thunderheads on the horizon. One looks like it may be coming our way and is putting on a bit of a light show. But thunderstorms on the horizon are a fact of life on the Gulf Coast and I wasn't going to say anything if he wasn't.

 

Well, another half hour or so go by, still no fish, and I hear "that storm looks to be getting kinda close." I casually reply "Ahh, don't worry about it, it's still a long ways off." Another bit goes by and I hear "Hey, I think we should think about going in." Normally I would have questioned his manhood out loud, but since the fishing sucked and it was becoming obvious to me I was related to a bad luck charm (I should call him Black Cloud Boy), I decided that going in maybe wasn't such a bad idea.

 

So I look back to shore, and realize we had waded a LONG ways. Say 1/2 mile or so. Doesn't sound like much, but you try to walk 1/2 mile through waist deep water. Takes a while! But, there is another option. So I say:

 

"Listen, it'll take us quite awhile to wade back, but there is a reef system just a little ways in front of us. We'll have to go through some pretty deep water, like neck deep, but once we get through that it gets way shallower, like knee deep and we can follow that reef to that island to our left, walk down the island, then it's another short shallow wade back to the car." I get the first, of what will be several "are you freakin' nuts" looks. But when he looks back to the long wade the other way goes along with my plan.

 

We get through the neck deep part in a few minutes, and the water starts to shallow up, just like I said. Then starts to deepen again. WTF? So I back up into the shallower water, look around to get my bearings and say: "OK, I was a little off on where we are. We are further out than I thought, and out here there are two deep parts. This one is a little wider, and unfortunately, a bit deeper than the one we just crossed. We're going to have to swim it, but it'll only take a couple of minutes. (I get look number two at this point). And by the way, those jeans you have on may get a bit heavy.(we were wearing long pants because it was jelly fish season. My long pants were lightweight fishing pants, because I am smart. His were heavy ass jeans, because he was stupid. Or at least that's how it works in my version of the story) So if you start getting tired, let me know and you can give me your rod and you can take off the jeans to swim" In look number three, he is no longer making any effort to hide his utter contempt/disdain for my totally rational plans.

 

Now I see him look back, again, to the long but safer wade back to the car. I'm pretty sure he was about to say "you, my friend, are effin crazy. I am wading back the easy but longer way." Unfortunately for him, the little thunderhead is noticeably closer, way more menacing, and pretty constantly lit up with lightening. Cool huh! Again, Mike agrees with my plan.

 

So we start to walk, and soon after, swim. And swim. And swim. Now I have swum this little gut a few times in my life. After a bit I always start to wonder whether 'm really where I think I am. Really, it all starts to look the same after awhile. So just when panic is starting to set in and I start to think how I'm going to explain to my sister in law how I killed her husband, (and I can't imagine what it was like for Mike, but thinking about it makes me laugh) I put my foot down and feel the relief of bottom! So we walk out of the deep and into the shallow. I say "that was fun" and get look #4 or maybe #5. I've lost count.

 

So, Mike says "so I just stay in the shallow water and walk toward that island?" I cavalierly reply "Yes, but that storm is probably going to hit before we get in. You are carrying a piece of graphite. Hold it down toward the water. If you feel it start to vibrate or hum, which happens when there is lots of static electricity in the air, you know, just before a lightening strike, drop it fast." Look #6 is forever seared in my memory. It was classic. Now we are in knee deep water, and while it's certainly easier than wading in waist deep, it still ain't all that easy. But Mike was GONE. Fastest I've ever seen anyone wade in my life. All I could see is ***hole and elbows and foam!

 

I didn't catch him until just after hit the island. All told it probably took us 1/2hour or so to get in. In all honesty, I can't really remember if the storm hit or not. I seem to think it did because I have a vague memory of walking the island with someone and both of us are soaking wet. But I've been caught in lots of storms, so I may be mixing stories. I will send this story to Mike. I'm sure he'll set me straight!!

 

Now I gotta say, there are two versions of the story. In my version I'm the level headed older brother in law taking the mostly city dwelling, slightly confused about the great outdoors brother in law on an unsuccessful fishing trip that had some interesting, but ultimately forgettable, things happen. In Mike's version, I'm a lunatic who almost drowned him.

 

You say tomato........

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Great story, Rick! :D

Ya know what my favorite part was? Well, I'll tell ya- the very first paragraph... it's frickin' brilliant, bro'!

When I read it, I could hear it like a movie narration in my head; pretty sure it was Morgan Freeman. :P

Can't really imagine Mr. Freeman saying "***hole and elbows and foam", though!

Lookin' forward to the next installment...

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You tell vivid stories, RickR. I look forward to them. It brought back a memory and there is no way I could tell it as good as you, but here goes anyway.

 

4 of us into a 7 day backpack. Day 6, I believe. Heading toward Maligne Lake. We just hiked about 18k and were at our destination. A nice camp in a nice safe valley on a nice sunny day. It was still early, so some jerk (who's name I'm still trying to forget) suggests we try to make the next one. Only one pass away. The other two agree and since I'm out numbered, I reluctantly agree. About 2 hours later, we find ourselves at the top of that pass, with horizontal rain pelting us mercilessly, the tallest tree about knee high, with lightning flashing all around us.

 

My only consolation during the whole ordeal was knowing that if I got struck, I wouldn't have known it. We all made it out alive. The rainbow was especially beautiful.

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Guest bigbadbrent

Rick,

 

get ahold of the book 'The River Why?'

 

the entire book reminds me of you

 

edit- hell remind me to lend it to you next time we go fishing

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You tell vivid stories, RickR. I look forward to them. It brought back a memory and there is no way I could tell it as good as you, but here goes anyway.

 

4 of us into a 7 day backpack. Day 6, I believe. Heading toward Maligne Lake. We just hiked about 18k and were at our destination. A nice camp in a nice safe valley on a nice sunny day. It was still early, so some jerk (who's name I'm still trying to forget) suggests we try to make the next one. Only one pass away. The other two agree and since I'm out numbered, I reluctantly agree. About 2 hours later, we find ourselves at the top of that pass, with horizontal rain pelting us mercilessly, the tallest tree about knee high, with lightning flashing all around us.

 

My only consolation during the whole ordeal was knowing that if I got struck, I wouldn't have known it. We all made it out alive. The rainbow was especially beautiful.

 

Hydro,

You got the nuts and bolts of it. Now just make up a bunch of *hit before and after!

 

Nice story. Hell of a lot more dangerous in the mountains than my little wading episode!

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