Birchy's Joke Of The Week

[birchy]

So a newfie is driving down the 401 in Toronto listening to the radio when suddenly a warning announcment comes on..

 

"Attention ladies and gentleman - please be advised that some crazed lunatic is driving down the 401 on the wrong side of the road - this is a very dangerous situation!"

 

The newfie - swerving wildly back and forth to avoid oncoming traffic - says "GEEZ B'Y.. THERE'S MORE THAN ONE OF EM!!!"

[Guest bigbadbrent]

'lord tunderin..'

 

 

bad joke, no suprise

[admin]

Hmmmm.. I guess they are getting better. Don't make them too good or you'll need to change the title.

[ham]

Ya agreed, I was actually enjoying the bad ones....

[Hawgstoppah]

That made me laugh...

[SteveM]

I hope you're proud of yourself, Birchy; picking on the people who ain't smart enough to defend themselves!

BTW, did you know that Newfoundland is the only place where new vehicles still have the hi-beam/low-beam switch

on the floor; apparently, when they started putting the lever on the steering column there was a rash of accidents

from Newfies getting their foot caught in the steering wheel!

Not all Newfies are dumb, though. The Newfoundland gov't commissioned a huge scientific study to find new uses for

the thousands of sheep on the island. According to the results that were just published they found 2 new uses for sheep

that nobody had thought of previously- meat & wool!

[birchy]

LOL.. I was wondering how long it would be before BobLoblaw chimed in!

 

I was going to say "while swerving back and forth wildly BobLoblaw said".. but figured I'd be nice and generalize.. hahaha.

[SteveM]

LOL.. I was wondering how long it would be before BobLoblaw chimed in!

 

I was going to say "while swerving back and forth wildly BobLoblaw said".. but figured I'd be nice and generalize.. hahaha.

 

You would immortalize me in your joke of the week? Birchy, I'm touched... tearing up... I'm OK now.. .

For the record, most Newfie jokes use the names "Jarge" or "Clar".

For example:

Clar says," Jarge, if you can guess how many loonies I got in me pocket, I'll give ya both of 'em."

Jarge replies, "T'ree?"

[Teck71]

Well Now ya gotta love makin jokes about those from The Rock, HUh

 

Well me Ma And Pa they's gettin a wee bit on in years, and the hydralic they ain't workin like they used to, so's they's heads off to the Doc.

 

Doc studys and looks at me Pa ups and down (mainly down ya knows whats I mean B'y) hands them the little blue pill and 'me PA storms outa da room yell bout ders be none of dat. eh!"

 

so the doc hands Ma the pill and tells her ta crush it up and slip it in his morning coffee. h'll never notice. and see me if theres a problem.

 

So a weeks gone by and me Ma shows Back up at the Doc's place and hands him the pills back

 

Doc asks her what the problem is don't they work?

 

Ma tels the Doc " jaysus b'y they work makes him a wild man I gives 1 in his coffee and he get half done thows me on the table and takes me right there,not once but trwice. It was great. but by lard tunderin Jaysus we'll never be able to go to the Tim Hortons agin"

 

And may the rock forever be in your heart B'y

Teck

[126barnes]

There was a Newf, Scot and Irishman sitting in a tavern on foreign soil, when the discussion of how good the pubs were back home arose. The scot was the first to pipe up claiming that his hometown pub toasted the house on last call every night. The two lads said that was pretty good but, nothing compared to back home. Paddy was the next to chime in stating that his waterhole gave a free pint for every two paid for. The Scot tipped his hat to Paddy while the Newf smirked in victory and laid claim to the prize winning pub. Will back home at the pub I visit you can drink all night long, not pay for one and then go out in the alley and have sex as many times as you want too. The Scot and Irish lad both look at each other and burst into laughter, F'ing Newf can't you tell the truth just one time. Now did that every happen to you, Newf? Newf responds, NO, but it happens to my sister every Friday-Saturday night.